Streamlined Thoughts….
Rvl’s Pick:
Tears of the Sun – Hans Zimmer
It was passed 0430 hours and I’m still tossing and turning in my bed. a horrid stench finally forced me to get up to open the windows and light up a fag. As I sit there waves of incoherent thoughts run through my mind. This is a strange night, on most occasion I sleep very well on Sunday night knowing full well I’ll be getting up for work the next morning, plus the usual Sunday activities would tire me out quite nicely. But tonight I find myself with thoughts of past, present and future and also the usual random ridiculous things.
Try as I might, I can’t recall anyone from college I’m still in-touch with, bar one person. I still see my lecturers from time to time, but as far as fellow students.. I’ve totally lost all contact. Can’t say the same for high school though, the closest company I keep are those I’ve known since then although it’s just a minor few. I’m thinking that this is because I really didn’t like the college crowd. I hardly had anything in common with any of them nor did I bother making any connections. This will come bite me in the ass sometime in the future, I’m sure of it.
Then I ran my thoughts on the people I’ve encounter throughout my social lifetime, I know of how most of them started, where they are now and where they should be soon. Some have rose to nosebleed heights, some carry-on with moderate lifestyles, others sadly are pushing up daisies and even sadder, some have been pushing up Ms. Daisy and are now playing parent.
As for me, well I think I still live on the borderline of moderate to extreme, keeping one foot firmly on the ground and another kicking and screaming in hot water. I’m just not content with a mediocre life and that reasoning has been my upshot and downfall.
Other thoughts on this night are on The Akai Onna, I’m finally taking her home today after a 2 week torturous wait. Another delay from the sellers would have resulted in heads rolling. I shall explain more on this on later entries related to The Affair.
Then my mind came across my very impressive but short-lived racing endeavours. I started thinking about what may have happened if I had just started 2 years earlier then I did. I would think I’d be in a very different place now but instead I now don a suit and take in the corporate living. I started thinking about all the tricks I’ve learnt from racing, keeping the revs in the powerband, shifting my weight in the turns and adjusting chassis settings according to track and driving mode. I even remember the mental taunts and exercise to which I still today to size up competition.
It’s as if I’m living my entire lifetime all over again in one night. All the good, the bad, the what ifs and what nots. As I take in one final puff, a grumble resonated from my stomach and I thought to myself: “What the fuck have I been eating?”
-Sayonara-
